Nadine Coyle's Video For Shit Single "Insatiable" Is Basically A How-To For Cheap Strippers

Folks, no one should be surprised by this trash. After all, Nadine Coyle perfected the art of masking mediocre treacle with tit-parade videos while doing time in stripper troupe Girls Aloud.

So now along comes the full video for "Insatiable," the just-passable warbler's debut solo single. We saw a glimpse of the clip on Friday, and when I pointed out the shortcomings of Nadine's latest assault on the ears of the masses, I was attacked by a pack of Girls Aloud stans who came skittering out of the woodwork like Prada Steve Madden-wearing cockroaches.

Well, here you go, kids. But just remember—a spray tan, designer clothes and an utter shit track don't make you a star. Well, unless you're in an upside-down split on a pole at Jumbo's Clown Room.

Nadine Coyle's Disastrous "Insatiable" Almost Makes Me Wish Girls Aloud Were Still Together

I just want to know: who listens to this shit? As if Cheryl Cole's latest assault on the ears "Promise This" isn't bad enough, Nadine Coyle apparently woke up one morning and decided to out-bore everyone with this plodding trash called "Insatiable."



Sorry, baby—dolling up in 14 different hooker outfits in the video doesn't make the song any less forgettable.

Maybe Nadine's time would be better spent on trying to get Six back together, now that she's 46 and finally old enough to be in the band?